"I'm not sure you'd have liked the man I knew either" It's not quite a shudder or a sigh that Giles says it with, but something lies subtly between the two, he doesn't want to think about chaos that likely would have ensued if the two had ever met back in the day.
Giles frowns, blinks, starts to say something, stops again, and repeats the process a few more times. How is he supposed to answer that? A reassurance of the truth of such a statement, the opposite, something inbetween?
"I'm not sure I'd say incapable as such, but is that..." He tilts his head to one side, watching Ossie carefully as he speaks "A problem?"
Ossie sighs, leaning to press his forehead to Giles' collarbone.
"I... where to begin... You understand better than anyone what was done to me in Arcadia, what I did to survive. Certain... acts of cruelty were rewarded, and... as you know, what is written is... difficult to erase, even upon our escape."
Deep, shaky breath.
"I'm a sadist, Giles. I'm not ashamed of it, and I know I'm not a monster for it, I just thought you knew."
"I can't say it comes as a surprise, but no I didn't know. Not really."
Though there's nothing of it in his voice, with Oswald so close the way Giles's heart races is evident. His eyes flick briefly to the door that had appeared and quickly been forgotten with everything that happened over the course of the last two months, but he pulls his attention back to Ossie just as quickly, and lays a kiss in his hair.
"I love you as you are, my dear, and I'm glad you're not ashamed."
"Thank you, my dear. Obviously it goes without saying that it's not something I ever need- I am of course more than contented with things as they are," he traces the back of his nail down Giles' immaculately ironed lapel.
"I don't think I ever could've believed I could be this happy."
Despite the soft words, his mind keeps circling back around, and Giles is keenly aware of all the ways his body can betray his thoughts. Heart, cheeks, eyes, he's just glad there isn't any loose glamour to be picked off him and lay things even barer.
"But if you wanted, I-"
Giles clears his throat rather than finish that thought. Please don't make him say it. Or... Maybe do.
Well, that's a very different situation entirely. Of course his nerves bat about in his stomach like a great seething horde of butterflies with tiny knives strapped to their wings, but...
If anything, Ossie's shift towards nerves makes Giles more confident.
"You know you're hardly the only one to come out the other side with desires shaped by the things done in Arcadia. I am a masochist, my love, though I have tried to hide it."
Edited (didn't quite sit right) Date: 2022-12-17 02:15 am (UTC)
"Not overly well, I must say," Ossie gently teases back, not wanting to be outdone. A hand snakes up to cup the back of Giles' head, his immaculately maintained nails pressing gently into his scalp. In the earlier days of their relationship, he would've balked at the very idea of this. At hurting Giles purposefully. But he's learned the joy that can come from being the happy recipient- of allowing Giles to do things for him. This is... the same, in reverse, really. The prospect of seeing welts on Giles' skin...
Any response Giles might have to the teasing abandons him entirely with the press of nails, his mouth falling slightly open with the promise it brings.
The request is answered with a hungry kiss as he scoops Ossie up easily into his arms. He doesn't rush exactly, but there is a distinct urgency in his steps as he carries Oswald to the bedroom.
Ossie half-cackles, reaching his arms around either side of Giles' neck to help hold himself up.
"My handsome man- oh I bet that brilliant mind of yours is just racing with ideas, isn't it? My darling boy. If I bite your ear, do you think you'll make it up the stairs?"
Giles growls, eyes dark as he looks down at Ossie. He genuinely doesn't know the answer to that question, because, yes, his mind is racing and in the best way possible. Anticipation and the newly opened possiblities blending into a cocktail of pure need.
That's all the permission he needs; Ossie bites into Giles' earlobe like a starved man at a feast. Not hard enough to draw blood yet, he still needs to gauge Giles' limits, but by the Wyrd he's fantasized about this for so long that he can scarcely contain himself.
His breath catches, and Giles has to hold Ossie tighter to keep from dropping him. Everything focuses down onto that one point of pain, the tight, sharp pressure on his earlobe, and the rush it brings.
"Ossie," he groans, already breathless "please"
Turns out the answer is no, they're not going to make it up the stairs.
Edited (ik it's Many days later but I realised I forgot a bit) Date: 2022-12-27 12:44 am (UTC)
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2022-12-15 02:07 am (UTC)"What was it that he said?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-15 03:11 am (UTC)Ossie's hands tighten ever so slightly on Giles' lapels.
no subject
Date: 2022-12-15 03:20 am (UTC)"I'm not sure I'd say incapable as such, but is that..." He tilts his head to one side, watching Ossie carefully as he speaks "A problem?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 07:22 am (UTC)"I... where to begin... You understand better than anyone what was done to me in Arcadia, what I did to survive. Certain... acts of cruelty were rewarded, and... as you know, what is written is... difficult to erase, even upon our escape."
Deep, shaky breath.
"I'm a sadist, Giles. I'm not ashamed of it, and I know I'm not a monster for it, I just thought you knew."
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 07:40 am (UTC)Though there's nothing of it in his voice, with Oswald so close the way Giles's heart races is evident. His eyes flick briefly to the door that had appeared and quickly been forgotten with everything that happened over the course of the last two months, but he pulls his attention back to Ossie just as quickly, and lays a kiss in his hair.
"I love you as you are, my dear, and I'm glad you're not ashamed."
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 08:51 am (UTC)"Thank you, my dear. Obviously it goes without saying that it's not something I ever need- I am of course more than contented with things as they are," he traces the back of his nail down Giles' immaculately ironed lapel.
"I don't think I ever could've believed I could be this happy."
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 09:10 am (UTC)Despite the soft words, his mind keeps circling back around, and Giles is keenly aware of all the ways his body can betray his thoughts. Heart, cheeks, eyes, he's just glad there isn't any loose glamour to be picked off him and lay things even barer.
"But if you wanted, I-"
Giles clears his throat rather than finish that thought. Please don't make him say it.
Or...
Maybe do.
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 09:19 am (UTC)You remember how Ossie's dumb as shit?
He's going to need to be clear.
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 09:25 am (UTC)"If you wanted to indulge in such things I would..." He clears his throat again, and takes another breath "I would very much enjoy it."
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 10:05 am (UTC)Well, that's a very different situation entirely. Of course his nerves bat about in his stomach like a great seething horde of butterflies with tiny knives strapped to their wings, but...
"You're sure?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-16 10:21 am (UTC)If anything, Ossie's shift towards nerves makes Giles more confident.
"You know you're hardly the only one to come out the other side with desires shaped by the things done in Arcadia. I am a masochist, my love, though I have tried to hide it."
no subject
Date: 2022-12-17 10:17 am (UTC)"Carry your darling up to the bedroom?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-17 10:33 am (UTC)The request is answered with a hungry kiss as he scoops Ossie up easily into his arms. He doesn't rush exactly, but there is a distinct urgency in his steps as he carries Oswald to the bedroom.
no subject
Date: 2022-12-22 03:36 am (UTC)"My handsome man- oh I bet that brilliant mind of yours is just racing with ideas, isn't it? My darling boy. If I bite your ear, do you think you'll make it up the stairs?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-22 04:01 am (UTC)"Why don't you find out?"
no subject
Date: 2022-12-22 04:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-12-22 12:28 pm (UTC)"Ossie," he groans, already breathless "please"
Turns out the answer is no, they're not going to make it up the stairs.